GIS A JOB!

Oxford University's animal abuse expansion programme helping to create job opportunities

We predict a short and uneventful career for the vet who opted for gainful employment in the field of animal care at Oxford University in answer to an advert, which appeared in the Veterinary Record Journal on July 30th 2005. Apparently, Oxford University - who, according to announcements made early this year in response to the launch of the SPEAK campaign - DON'T plan to use the South Parks Rd facility as a vivisection laboratory, DON'T plan to house primates there, and who DON'T plan to breed them, were looking for additional veterinary staff to NOT look after the animals they WON"T have!! If that doesn't sound too clear, it's because it isn't!!

The new veterinary surgeon will be working alongside three in-house veterinary surgeons "making a positive contribution to the welfare of laboratory animals within the University", presumably in the sense of turning a blind eye to the carryings-on of a research professor who has committed criminal acts, and giving him carte blanche in the field of breaching animal welfare laws.

The vet's duties will be to advise on the health and welfare of laboratory animals in the University's "animal using" (using??) departments, providing "clinical veterinary care" to a wide range of species, including primates. Other duties will include providing technical support to research projects, participating in the training of personnel working under the Act, and active involvment in the ethical review of project licence applications and all work involving animals.

But the icing on the cake, for those who like icing, is that there will also be the opportunity to join the ranks of those working their way up the "corporate ladder". The new vet can also undertake their very own independent scientific research projects. Presumably, s/he will also be in charge of the ethical review for any project licence application necessary for said research, no doubt ensuring an unbiased and balanced assessment of his/her suitability for the task!

So what's the salary these days for colluding in torture? Well, apart from being full of hidden perks, it can start off with as little as £27,116-£35,883 per annum and rise to a discreet £42,573, depending on previous animal abuse experience. 38 days' holiday per annum, mileage allowance, pension contributions and funded CPD.

were under the impression that being a veterinary surgeon meant you helped save lives...